Products & Production
Andy: Who is making the bracelets when we get an order? I am NOT making them. I need to be in the zone to make them. And I have a new contract in Kuala Lumpur. I am not fucking shipping them from there.
Vick: Enough with your damn complaining. Pour yourself a scotch, then you can be in the zone.
Bobby: Be serious you morons, there is no drinking when spinning bracelets, we can’t have fuck ups.
Andy: “Spinning”? Is that the new term for stringing a bracelet? To Spin them? I can live with that. It reminds me of another way of using “spinning”. Ha ha
Vick: Shut the fuck up, we are not X-rated here. Swearing is OK, but no sexual stuff.
Andy: Oh so you know what I am referring to?
Vick: Of course I do, who doesn’t love a good spinner. Andy, do gay men also do spinning?
Andy: You bet your tight ass we do. LOVE a good spinner.
Bobby: Enough you fucking losers. Keep it on subject.
Andy: I am traveling too much, I can’t do it.
Bobby: We all said we would help out. We need ateliers in each of our cities plus in Costa Rica.
Andy: What the hell is an Atelier? Is that another one of your stupid French words. I looked it up, it says “work shop.” Why can’t you use proper English you French frog?
Bobby: I am not French. I am German. So screw you too, you British Bastard. I will seriously crack your ass when I see you next.
Vick: For a German you use a shitload of French and you speak English with a French accent. OK GUYS, We each need to have all the gear in our homes. All beads. All X-lastics. All silver shit. Measuring boards, velvet bags and boxes. Everything. I swear to god if we get one bad review because of fuck-ups I will pay each and every one of you a visit. I will crack all your heads in. And, everyone will help out. I hope I am crystal clear about this.
Roland: What did I miss?
Vick: Bobby is a frog. A French frog.
Roland: Yeah yeah and he claims to be German. Tell me something I don’t know. But it’s better than being a Latino from East LA. Now shut the fuck up. Everyone has got to help out.
Vick: What's wrong with being a Latino? Anyhow, poker tonight in Tamarindo, you coming for the poker game?
Andy: In for poker.
Bobby: In for Poker.
Roland: Can’t go out tonight, wife is on the warpath. I am in the goddamn dog house.
Bobby: You deserve it. Lisa doesn’t need you stumbling in piss-ass drunk at 4am. Wish us luck, wish you were there. To the BRVVA-HOOD!
Andy: To the BRVVA-HOOD.
Vick: To the BRVVA-HOOD.
Roland: Amen, I already miss you bastards.
We have convinced Roland that he might have a small drinking problem. We are keeping an eye on him. He promises us it only happens when he is in Costa Rica. We think he is full of shit. We are four buddies. We are the only ones making the bracelets. Limited production – Quality Shit. The bracelets will be shipped from anywhere in the world where we have our portable workshops. Who the fuck has portable workshops? Well clearly we do.
Roland: I seriously hate it when my bracelets are too tight on my wrists. It freaks me out.
Vick: Dude, I have known you for 4 years, lots of shit freaks you out.
Andy: You mean like when his salad touches his meat on a plate
Roland: Fuck you, that is a real thing.
Bobby: Or when they put lemon instead of lime in your Corona
Roland: I am traditionalist
Vick: Roland is right, I hate when my bracelets are too tight. It gives me the twitches. The Heebie-Jeebies.
Bobby: The what?
Vick: WTF planet are you from? The Heebie-Jeebies. You know when something creeps you out.
Bobby: Your sister creeps me out, she is so touchy touchy feely feely. She is a Heebie-Jeebie. I hate when she visits you in Costa Rica. I feel like she is always staring at my ass.
Vick: Fuck you, leave my sister out of it. And you idiot, it is a feeling not a person.
Roland: Enough you 2 goddamn idiots. What's the policy. We are giving clear details on what is an XS - all the way to XL. All that is in the page HERE. We will always be closer to the lower end of the sizing.
Vick: Yup, that sounds reasonable to me.
Bobby: Me too. Reasonable. An extra bead here or there to make sure it fits just right
Andy: Sure sure, you are all crazy, I still like ‘em when they are nice and tight on my skin.
BRVVAS will never arrive too tight. Andy might like tight shit, we don’t. CHECK OUT THE SECTION ON SIZINGS. Read it. Don’t be lazy pricks. Don’t screw it up. If you do, well that’s cool, we are all BRVVAS. We ain't fucking perfect. Except Brad Pitt - He is perfect.
Roland: Look at your 8mm & 10mm bracelets, see anything cool about it? That was my idea. It is not on ANY of the product pictures. It's our gorgeous branded silvery disk.
Andy: You are such an arrogant dick. One fucking good idea and you think you are a goddamn superstar.
Bobby: You are no no star Roland. We love you but you are no hotshot star.
Roland: Volleyball later today, I am spiking a ball in each of your faces.
Vick: You couldn’t spike a bowl of punch with 2 bottles of rum in your hand. You stink at volleyball.
Roland: Fuck all of you, I am an esquisite player and by far better than all of you.
Andy: You are an epic moron, we spell it eXquisite
Roland: Oh sorry, I wasn’t brought up in Jolly Old England.
Vick: You are not better than me and this thread is not about volleyball it's about the “You know what.”
Andy: A. We need a name for the “You know what.”
Bobby: Let’s name it after Roland. It hangs. Let’s call it Roland's Hanging Ball.
Roland: Fuck all of you, you will NOT name it Roland’s Hanging Ball. And it’s not even a fucking ball.
Andy: LET’S CALL A VOTE – all in favor of Roland’s Hanging Ball.
Vick: Agreed. Clients, it is unobtrusive and it's a way of knowing what is an authentic BRVVA bracelet.
Bobby: Agreed.
Roland: I hate this democratic shit. You are all assholes. It's not a fucking ball, it's a goddamn disk.
BRVVA wristwear that are 8mm and 10mm bead diameters will come with a very special but unobtrusive unique brand tag. The brand tag will be black for our black beads and silver for our brown beads.
Roland: From Everywhere!
Vick: Roland it is a serious question, we need to give a goddamn serious answer.
Andy: As you know the 4 of us spend a lot of time in our other places of residence, around the world.
Bobby: I spend a lot of time in China and more and more in Taiwan.
Vick: Me in India.
Andy: I am often in Malaysia and Indonesia.
Roland: I am in Bangladesh and Miami.
Vick: And we have been there for years, over half our lives away from the countries of our birth. Modern men of the world.
Andy: So sourcing is both easy and a complete bitch as whatever we source has to find its way to our 4 workshops.
Bobby: Silver & other metals comes from China & India with a touch from Indonesia.
Roland: Wooden beads are sourced from around the world. Brazil features more and more. We think Vick likes the Brazil suppliers cuz he meets tons of chicks. Tell us the truth Vick.
Vick: Leave me alone. Stone items are from China. Also the X-Lastic is coming from China. The X-lastic is a nylon wrapped elastic that is used in the apparel industry - it is super hi-tech.
So, here we go. Our gear is sourced from around the world. And as we discussed earlier, we four dudes “spin” them all until that is no longer possible and we will then figure out alternatives. The metal items MIGHT change slightly from our picture. Why? Cuz running into issues with the various suppliers is a strong possibility. That shit does happen and if you know anything about sourcing then you will know what we mean. But pics will be updated quite promptly. As always we have a “no question” 60-day satisfaction guarantee.